20 Jul Can people Change?
“People cannot change”
During my sociology classes at school, I was told we all see the world differently because of nature and nurture. This class only went as far as reaching our primary development phases and didn’t take into account that as adults we can overwrite our original mental frameworks through study and self-development.
If you asked me 15 years ago or even 10 years ago it would have come as a shock to me to hear phrases like “I am not the same person I was 5 years ago”. After all, I was told by my very respected teachers that once you are an adult (whatever that means) you are done, you will never really change and only minor tweaks will happen in your perception of reality. Truth is, I have been hearing this phrase more and more frequently over the past couple of years, as well as, experienced the feeling myself.
Do people change or evolve or both?
I blame it on a couple of things; firstly I slowly transformed and opened myself to the possibility of people evolving through self-development and general life experiences. I have been doing a lot of introspection and insightful work. Trying to confront who I thought I was, with who I really am.
Secondly, today the world is moving at a considerably faster paced than ever before in its long history and knocks down people’s core beliefs at a never before encountered speed. Third, the is an unprecedented access to information that demystifies “legends”, “old ladies tales” and other social constructions that in the past decades were considered “absolute truth”. Basically, you can fact check anything, you don’t need to believe something because your “mom told you so”. Lifting the veil of ignorance is the most disruptive force and the one strongest single driver when considering why people evolve.
Additionally, we have every day new examples of bravery from common people, like you and me that encourage breaking with traditional values and POV. No matter, what you are considering reevaluating in your life, you can easily find someone that has already done it and can give you ideas or at least a broad picture of how the journey was.
Lastly, people used to be afraid of change to avoid being called out as pariahs, lose their friends, family, and anything they have known. We now have the internet and other social tools that make it very easy to find a tribe that will support us and we won’t feel alone or “fighting “ the “good fight”.
I can’t imagine my grandmother saying, I will start meditating and following some Wiccan traditions that go against my core Christian principles. Can you? She would have been shamed and expelled in her community. At best, she would have practiced in secret and attended mass on Sunday as well. Nowadays, it is not too far fetch to see drastic religious, sexual, educational, professional career switches as people walk the journey of self-discovery and work hard to remain true to themselves.
I feel blessed to live in this new era of discovery and where individuality is highly prized. Where I can be whoever I won’t be. Of course, it is not an easy path, it takes a lot of personal work, effort, growing pains and self-acceptance. Not everything that we find we were or we are we are going to like, but knowledge is power. It is the power to transform ourselves into our best version. Being our best version, the one closest to our heart and that resonates with our soul’s purpose.
No more social mandates that we cannot break because we are afraid or know nothing better. If we don’t do it, it is because we are either not ready to confront and take responsibility for ourselves or we are lazy and don’t want to put the work in.
What are you going to chose? wherein the journey are you? Do you love yourself?
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